![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Tigereans and Weres: The buffet
Jun. 10th, 2011 06:11 pmA short piece that I found amusing.
May 25th
"Are you sure this is such a good idea? I've seen how much you can eat." Sh'Meral gave me an odd look at my suggestion of going to one of the local Chinese buffets for lunch. My laughter was not helping much either; My main concern was rather the opposite. While it would have been good for Katholos to come with us, it would have looked funny bringing a fourth person with us who neither ate nor drank anything. So, she rode along inside my head as we all climbed into the Big Blue Bus and headed over to one of the local buffet restaurants.
The staff at the front counter were initially shocked as two large felinoids and a human walked up to the door; the shock turned into amusement as the human opened the door and ushered the two in before him. They were conversing in their own language, with it's mewling, grunts, and occasional hiss/spit. They all fell silent as they approached the counter, and the human pushed his way between the two and asked for a booth and three for the buffet in English. They shrugged, range them up on the register, and as they directed the group to a booth, the human explained what the place was, how it operated, and how to get food.
We got shown to our booths, and I ordered iced tea for the three of us. Fortunately, I knew that they could handle it, as long as lemons did not approach the glass. I was just getting over the shudders of that ill-fated tea party when Ch'Mrr got my attention back by asking me what to do next. "Well, I would wait until the waitress brings the tea over, then we’ll go over to the line and get some food."
I spent a minute or two explaining how additional helpings worked, plate etiquette, and so on until the drinks arrived. I asked for three sets of chopsticks, proceeded to sweeten my tea, and then I led them over to the buffet line and we got a heaping plate each of food. As we sat down, I noticed that the chopsticks had been dropped off, and I handed a pair to each of them. Ch'Mrr gave me a nasty look as he pulled a slim container from inside his coat pocket, and handed one of the two pairs of sticks inside to Sh'Meral and replaced the empty case inside his pocket. I shrugged and started plowing through the giant pile of lo-mien and crab puffs on my plate.
It was a good hour and a half and about five-six plates apiece later that management asked how we were doing, and just where we were putting all that food. I looked at my two fuzzy companions, winked, and told the manager the truth regarding a thereianthrope's mass reserves. He didn't buy it, strangely, enough, and said that there was a limit of sorts to just how much food we could eat, and that we had reached it. He was very polite about it, but was unwilling to allow us to continue our dining experience. Sh'Meral, not wanting to make it a bigger scene, thanked the manager for being as generous as he had been, and stated that we would leave. She withdrew a couple small gemstones from a pouch in one of her pockets, and told him that she hoped that these would be a small compensation for any trouble we had caused before we left.
I later found out two additional things- the gemstones were worth probably my old yearly salary at the casino, and when I went back myself several days later with some human friends that they would not let me or my friends in- I had been blacklisted from that restaurant, much to my friends amusement and my embarrassment.
May 25th
"Are you sure this is such a good idea? I've seen how much you can eat." Sh'Meral gave me an odd look at my suggestion of going to one of the local Chinese buffets for lunch. My laughter was not helping much either; My main concern was rather the opposite. While it would have been good for Katholos to come with us, it would have looked funny bringing a fourth person with us who neither ate nor drank anything. So, she rode along inside my head as we all climbed into the Big Blue Bus and headed over to one of the local buffet restaurants.
The staff at the front counter were initially shocked as two large felinoids and a human walked up to the door; the shock turned into amusement as the human opened the door and ushered the two in before him. They were conversing in their own language, with it's mewling, grunts, and occasional hiss/spit. They all fell silent as they approached the counter, and the human pushed his way between the two and asked for a booth and three for the buffet in English. They shrugged, range them up on the register, and as they directed the group to a booth, the human explained what the place was, how it operated, and how to get food.
We got shown to our booths, and I ordered iced tea for the three of us. Fortunately, I knew that they could handle it, as long as lemons did not approach the glass. I was just getting over the shudders of that ill-fated tea party when Ch'Mrr got my attention back by asking me what to do next. "Well, I would wait until the waitress brings the tea over, then we’ll go over to the line and get some food."
I spent a minute or two explaining how additional helpings worked, plate etiquette, and so on until the drinks arrived. I asked for three sets of chopsticks, proceeded to sweeten my tea, and then I led them over to the buffet line and we got a heaping plate each of food. As we sat down, I noticed that the chopsticks had been dropped off, and I handed a pair to each of them. Ch'Mrr gave me a nasty look as he pulled a slim container from inside his coat pocket, and handed one of the two pairs of sticks inside to Sh'Meral and replaced the empty case inside his pocket. I shrugged and started plowing through the giant pile of lo-mien and crab puffs on my plate.
It was a good hour and a half and about five-six plates apiece later that management asked how we were doing, and just where we were putting all that food. I looked at my two fuzzy companions, winked, and told the manager the truth regarding a thereianthrope's mass reserves. He didn't buy it, strangely, enough, and said that there was a limit of sorts to just how much food we could eat, and that we had reached it. He was very polite about it, but was unwilling to allow us to continue our dining experience. Sh'Meral, not wanting to make it a bigger scene, thanked the manager for being as generous as he had been, and stated that we would leave. She withdrew a couple small gemstones from a pouch in one of her pockets, and told him that she hoped that these would be a small compensation for any trouble we had caused before we left.
I later found out two additional things- the gemstones were worth probably my old yearly salary at the casino, and when I went back myself several days later with some human friends that they would not let me or my friends in- I had been blacklisted from that restaurant, much to my friends amusement and my embarrassment.
